Two ne'er-do-wells, Washington and Jefferson, just out of prison are looking for jobs so they won't get arrested for vagrancy. They find out that the wealthy Mrs. Brown is looking to hire a butler and a maid, and Jefferson talks Washington into dressing up as a woman so they can get both jobs. They get the jobs, but they soon run into Bad News Johnson, a crook they met in prison. They find out that Johnson is planning to pull a con on Mrs. Brown and he wants them to go in on it with him. Complications ensue.

The queen of Egypt barges the Nile and flirts with Mark Antony and Julius Caesar.

Shortly before the curtain goes up the first time at the latest performance of Earl Carroll's Vanities, someone is attempting to injure the leading lady Ann Ware, who wants to marry leading man Eric Lander. Stage manager Jack Ellery calls in his friend, policeman Bill Murdock, to help him investigate. Bill thinks Jack is offering to let him see the show from an unusual viewpoint after he forgot to get him tickets for the performance, but then they find the corpse of a murdered woman and Bill immediately suspects Eric of the crime.