Bernie's a bumbling hit man married to a buxom beauty. When he arrives at a resort in beautiful Miami Beach, he is incensed to find his wife in bed with a local lifeguard. It's not long before hilarious adventures ensue when the world's worst assassin wreaks all kinds of havoc in an attempt to protect his honor. The topless beach resort will never be the same as Bernie seeks redemption among the cabana boys and the bikini clad residents at one of the Sunshine State's tropical hot spots.

After being implanted with a microchip that gives him special powers, a dog engages a young boy in conversation and adventure. Befriended by a local police officer, the dog, the boy and his friend go on a quest to save the world by undoing the insidious plot of an evil scientist to turn all kids into mindless robots.