Documentary vacation trip through the high and especially naked north.

Twenty years after his teenage crush on a football-mad schoolgirl, Gregory is back at his old school, teaching English. When two of his pupils uncover evil practices at a local factory they want their teacher to help them expose the wrong-doer, who happens to be Greg's old schoolfriend.

Alan and Mary are pretty miserable together and split up. As a very presentable Glaswegian photographer, Alan soon has chances to find consolation elsewhere, but more and more thinks of Mary. She, however, seems a lot less keen to try again.