A classical art professor and collector, who doubles as a professional assassin, is coerced out of retirement to avenge the murder of an old friend.

When Harry Walters runs out of gas, he gets picked up by a beautiful young woman. But when she pulls a gun on him and orders him to take his clothes off, Harry puts up no resistance and is sexually assaulted. He reports the incident to the authorities, but they either don't believe him, or, if they do, can't understand why he would consider it a crime - a reaction he also gets from his friends and family.

The overall title for five short sketches by Neil Simon. 1: "The Greasy Diner." The story of a couple who enter a diner, take one look around, then wish they had never entered. 2: "The Man Who Got a Ticket." The story of a driver who is issued 369 summonses by a confused computer. 3: "The Night Visitor." The efforts of a detective to catch an elusive prowler. 4: "The Office Sharers." The story of Ernie and Ben, friends who have worked side by side for eight years without an argument until... 5: "Double Trouble." The story of a husband who wrenches his back while closing the window for his wife who has the chills.

As a young girl, Alison Parker attempted suicide after being traumatized by her father's sexual exploits. Now an elite fashion model, she moves to a Brooklyn Heights apartment building where she encounters a number of bizarre, eccentric tenants and attempts to uncover the building's sinister secret.

While living rough on the streets of London's East End, a young man named Dink encounters the mysterious Dee and they begin a relationship. When tenderness gives way to cruelty, they become consumed by darkness.

The story of three wildly neurotic characters: a facially disfigured girl, a homosexual paraplegic, and an introvert epileptic who, after leaving the hospital, set up housekeeping together in a cottage where they support each other.