Billy (Cliff Curtis) is trying to organize the biggest celebration the town of Waimatua has even seen - the 75th Jubilee of their school. In doing this, feckless Billy is trying to redeem himself in the eyes of his family, especially his frustrated wife Pauline (Theresa Healey). However trouble arrives with the return of a local former All Blacks Captain, an old flame of Pauline's.

The Tongan Ninja is dispatched to the island nation of New Zealand in order to help a brother of his master with his floundering Chinese restaurant. But the mysterious Mister Big stands in the eatery's way as he sends numerous villains such as Knife Man, Gun Man, and the super-sexy Action Fighter who may know a lot about the hero.

Sayo and Keiji have eloped to New Zealand to marry, away from the interference of Keiji's disapproving mother in Japan. On their honeymoon, they have the freedom to express their love away from her repressive influence. However, on what should be the happiest of days, Keiji is drowned and Sayo must, by custom, return to live with her cruel and selfish mother-in-law.

A trio of accidental outlaws travel the length of New Zealand, protesting conformity and chasing lost love, with a posse of cops and a media frenzy in pursuit.